From the time I was a little kid I wanted to be a singer. And I sang often when no one was listening. I also sang during music class at school. I joined a choir in the fifth grade and continued singing in choirs until high school graduation. I discovered the guitar during this time (didn't everybody?) and learned as many cool licks as I could. I realized that a singer who played guitar well could do okay in life.
While in the Air Force I met a lot of different musicians. I learned as much as I could from them and showed them what I knew whenever they asked. It was a surprisingly fertile time in my musical life. It was also during this time that the notion of professional music was cemented in my brain and my path was (more or less) set.
In the two or three years after my military service, while knocking around looking for gigs and trying to support a young family, I lost my infatuation with professional singing. Although I had gotten pretty good at it, I was starting to have some problems with my voice. Laryngitis! Chronic, painful, full-on laryngitis. I was a solo performer and four hours of singing was killing me. Some nights my throat hurt so bad by the third set I could barely finish a cigarette. (Yeah, you read that right.) So I would "pad" the evening with guitar instrumentals.
So there was a course correction and I continued in music as a solo guitarist. I still needed a day job so I focused on teaching guitar. As it turned out I really loved it and teaching quickly replaced my need or desire to perform. So I returned to singing at home when no one but family was around. But then I started to sing in church and found out that my church family really liked it. So I joined the church choir.
A few months ago the dear lady who was our accompanist and choir director became ill. A replacement organist was found and I was asked to direct the choir until she returned. But it was cancer and we lost her shortly after. And I found myself directing instead of singing. I honestly didn't want the responsibility but what is one to do?
Then in late spring I got a cold. It lasted longer than usual and I had a persistent cough. I just couldn't shake it. I was worried so I talked to my doctor but he assured me it was just a lingering cough. But I could no longer sing. Just trying to sing with the radio in the car would cause me to gasp for air and cough. I'd stopped smoking 24 years ago so it couldn't be that. Just this stupid cold. For the first time in my life my ability to sing was completely gone and I felt incomplete. I no longer had the choice. I just plain couldn't do it.
Fortunately my cold finally went away and I gradually regained the ability to sing again. I decided to revisit my "singing" side. I also decided to renew my energy and efforts toward our little choir at church. Whatever singing deficits they may have falls on my shoulders to remedy. So I took a leap and started taking singing lessons from a friend who is a very good teacher.
I'm not going to lie. I was concerned about doing this at such a late stage in life. But once again I'm letting my "stupid" show through. It was fun, informative, and likely transformative as I reinvent myself as a choir director and perhaps composer/arranger. I have high hopes for this little choir and I'll probably make them a little frazzled, but I think it's going to be an interesting chapter. And they will learn to cringe when they hear me say, "Hey! I've got an idea......"